Anarchist Application Form

Welcome Earthlings, we come in peace.

 

The aim of this form is to enable you to present yourself in all your inestimable glory so that we may prod, poke, prevaricate and ponder whether or not you make the grade for membership in the Armchair Anarchist Apathy Club.

Of course, this may provoke in you a desire to question the authority under which such estimation is conducted, and this is only logical on your part. To view a brief of the terms under which you will be examined, and the basis on which your application will be superficially screened, vilified, discounted and eventually discarded - refer to our Terms of Reference. We trust you will find them to your satisfaction.

Your Name (required)

Your Email (required)

Subject

Your Experience in this area

Now please describe in 8 words or less just how important you believe Vegemite will be to the future of world peace and a true integration of race, colour and creed.

If you accept the primary premise underlying the above question, please indicate your confirmation below.

We will need you to provide copies of documentation to prove your identity, your height, weight and colour preferences for incidental stationery supplies. All copies are to be appropriately certified, with nice virtual plastic sleeves Photoshopped over the scanned images. Not sure how you'd do this but that is what we want. And a shrubbery. A nice little one with pretty little lanes between the rows.

Thank you for taking the time to complete and submit your application form. Armchair Anarchists are a rather apathetic group, so it is highly likely that grass in any lawn near you will grow considerably before you receive confirmation or validation from us. Just remember those famous words, “don’t panic”.

While you are waiting with baited breath for our response, why not tighten up your correspondence skills with a small bout of literary self-analysis?

Compare your anarchistic achievements with this man’s, in 200 words or less.

Thank you

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